Weekend at the lake house

We have friends in north jersey. They live in Sparta. Yes, we do get drunk, stand out on their deck and yell "THIS IS SPARTA!". At least I have. More than once. But I digress. We frequently go up to visit these friends. They technically live in lake Mohawk, very close to the lake, walking distance. It's lovely up there. We refer to their house as our lake house. What are your plans for the weekend people ask, oh we're going to the lake house. LOL No kids, no pressure, just relaxing, eating and drinking. Of course the 3 dogs will be noisier than 3 children will be. 3 Jack Russell terrorists in the same place for 24 hours. Should be interesting. This is the first weekend we're spending up there since we got Abby. That's it for now. Time to get ready to go. More on the weekend when I get home tomorrow.

The Cake is NOT a lie.

Here's the cake recipe, delicious and moist. Of course I'm having trouble finding volatile malted milk impoundments so it might not be as good as the original.

The Cake

one 18.25 ounce chocolate cake mix
one can prepared coconut pecan frosting
3/4 cup vegetable oil
4 large eggs
one cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
3/4 cup butter or margarine
1 2/3 cup granulated sugar
2 cups all purpose flower
don't forget garnishes such as:
fish shaped crackers
fish shaped candies
fish shaped solid waste
fish shaped dirt
fish shaped Ethel benzine
pull n' peel licorice
fish shaped volatile organic compounds
and sediment shaped sediment
candy coated peanut butter pieces; shaped like fish
one cup lemon juice
alpha resins
unsaturated polyester resin
fiberglass surface resins
volatile malted milk impoundments
9 large egg yokes
12 medium geosynthetic membranes
one cup granulated sugar
an entry called: "How To Kill Someone With Your Bare-Hands"
2 cups rhubarb; sliced
2/3 granulated rhubarb
1 Tbsp all-purpose rhubarb
1 tsp grated orange rhubarb
3 Tbsp rhubarb; on fire
1 Large rhubarb
1 cross Bohr hole electromagnetic imaging rhubarb
2 Tbsp rhubarb juice
adjustable aluminum head positioned
slaughter electric needle injector
cordless electric needle injector
injector needle driver
injector needle gun
cranial caps
and it contains proven preservatives, deep penetration agents, and gas and oder control chemical's that will deodorize and preserve putrid tissue.

Nothing to see here

Move along. Move along.

Well, it's been a quiet week on the appliance front. They're all behaving the way they should. Even the fridge. They all saw what happened to the microwave and don't want to end up on the same scrap heap. Oh, that nuker didn't get off lightly. I kicked it and beat it with a metal meat tenderizer before loading it into the car for it's trip to the recycling center. That'll learn them to quit working on me.

Really, that's about all I've got. Sorry. Maybe I'll think of something witty to post later.

Viva la Revolution!

The blender, toaster and microwave must have had a secret meeting earlier this week. They all decided to commit suicide at exactly the same time. I missed that meeting while I was alseep obviously. All three appliances have been dying slow death over the past 6 months. The nuker door won't open with the press of the button, you have to push the button and pry the door open at the same time. Convenient while your hands are full of things that need to go in to the nuker. This morning it took 5 full minutes to heat a bowl of pasta to a temp hot enough to melt cheese. Actually, the cheese never melted. There is still cool to the touch mozzarella on top of my pasta. Before it heated the pasta though, it counted down the timer to zero without actually doing anything else but count down. I reset the timer and leaned on the door, then it counted down and actually tried to heat the food. It is an 9 year old appliance to be fair. The toaster, she only toasts on one one side. To be exact, it's a 4 slice toaster, but only two slices toast, the other two are dead. The toaster is 5 or 6 years old now and has seen a lot of abuse. I don't blame it for wanting to take itself out of the game. The blender, I thought that would last forever. It's a 20 year old Waring bar blender, all stainless steel and metal parts. It still works. Kinda. It's slow to catch and start. But once she gets going, she makes short work of anything I throw at her. Maybe she just needs a cleaning. I'll try it. That toaster and nuker though, they need to be replaced soon. Like this weekend. Why do the appliances all revolt and die at the same time as if it was some sort of coordinated effort? Is it Skynet? GLaDOS? I'd better watch my back, I think the wall oven was looking at me funny earlier. Not funny "haha" either.